#14 Condom Ambulances
In Sweden, they take condom use very seriously. They even have condom ambulances. These rescue vehicles show up at “high risk” locations and hand out condoms to horny Swedes.
#13 Condoms Are Lifesavers
One night, a woman got drunk, stole a box of condoms and subsequently fell overboard. She then filled the condoms with air and made a life raft. It kept her afloat until she was rescued three days later.
#12 Condoms on Broadway
During the performance of Cats, performers had to wear microphones under their costumes. To keep the microphones from getting wet with sweat, they covered them with condoms. Meow!
#11 More than a Mouthful
You should probably buy your condoms before your next wild vacation to Denmark. The Danish word for condom is Svangerskabsforebyggendemiddel. Try saying that one time fast, much less three.
In the 18th century, they made condoms from natural substances like sheep, lamb and goat intestines. Some condoms were even made from fish skin. We bet you’ve never been so glad about the invention of latex in your life.
#9 Magnum Condoms are Ego Boosters
Trojan makes Magnum condoms to fit the largest penis sizes. But they make them elastic enough so that they fit regular sizes as well. This way, regular guys get an ego boost and hopefully show a little brand loyalty. Sorry.
#8 The World’s Largest Condom
The world’s largest condom is a staggering 220 feet long. The Argentinians who made this giant pink condom for World Aids Day put it on a giant obelisk, the most phallic architectural structure they could find.
#7 Condoms at War
American soldiers use condoms to protect their rifles from getting clogged with sand and other debris. Feel free to send a carton or two in your next care package to the troops.
#6 Spray On Condoms
If actually putting a condom on is too much trouble for you or your mate, why not try condoms in a can? Before you run out to the store, you should know that German scientists haven’t perfected spray-on laytex. But feel free to sign up as a test dummy.
#5 They’re Great for Starting Fires
Fill a condom with about a quart of water. Gather up some paper, dried leaves or other kindling. Then hold the water-filled condom over the kindling so that light shines through it. The shape of the condom will refract the light to a single point and start a fire in moments.
#4 Condom Vending Machines are Old News
Since 1928, establishments have offered condoms in vending machine. That little invention has probably helped keep the US population down to a relatively conservative 300 million.
#3 Valentine’s Day is National Condom Day
Tell that to your Valentine the next time February 14th. In fact, in honor of the day you should pick up a box of one of humanity’s most practical inventions.
#2 Condoms With Teeth
You read that right. These female condoms are designed to be worn by women who are at high-risk of being assaulted. And any man who assaults a woman wearing this will never assault anyone again.
#1 Condom Cave Paintings
Not all cave paintings feature majestic animals and decisive battles. Some of them featured condoms. In fact, the earliest reference to a condom in history comes from a cave: the Grotte des Combarrelles in France is between 12,000 and 15,000 years old and features condoms prominently.